Feb 7, 2011

Successful Self Help Marriage Tips.

By Areelitaha Joahlanski


Problem identification- Problem identification is the first step to successfully solving marital problems. Once problems are identified self help marriage guidelines are easy to find on "Save My Marriage Today" at www.savemymarriagetoday.com,corresponding with the problems you are encountering. Couples should try to be as objective about marital troubles as they possibly can, no matter how impossible it feels or appears, if the problems are left unattended they will just breed and increase in size and severity.

When will you need a counsellor?- It is imperative to rather seek the assistance of a counsellor sooner rather than later. If the couples show any blame-shifting or denial behaviour as well as problems in the general household with conflict management and resolution, a counsellor should be the first person to call.

Objectivity- When deciding on a marriage counsellor it is imperative to realise that you need not use only Psychologists or Ministers in other words qualified professionals. As long as the person is good listener, honest, trustworthy and objective in their feelings towards the couple as well as in his or her overall opinion, they will be suitable to handle the matter successfully. Old married couples are excellent counsellors. They have the knowledge and experience to give you advice and guide you on a range of situations and problems they have had personal experience of during their martial life.

Half full and empty- No matter how tuff or frustrating the situation your marriage is facing, you should view the glass as half full and not as half empty. All situations have pro's and con's. Draw up a list and you notice that the positive outweigh the negatives significantly.

Speak your mind and hear- Lack of proper communication between couples is the biggest pitfall in marriages and even in marriage counselling. Speak your mind and heart on matters you feel unhappy or sad about. By suppressing feelings and emotions of hurt and disappointment you will just prevent healing and happiness in your life. Speak out about feelings, emotions, fears and expectations you have for your marriage. Misunderstandings are easily avoidable by merely communicating with your partner.

Quality time for yourself and your partner- Spending time apart as well as together is important for you and your partner to miss each other enough to appreciate one another again while on the other hand it will give you time to reflect on your own heart and soul. Unfortunately, during these hectic times we as couples tend to spend more time apart than together. This has the potential to lead to spouses drifting apart more and more until they totally loose touch with their partners needs and feelings. It is essential that spouses make time for one another even if it means via appointments. Enjoy the times spent together thoroughly and try to steer clear from fighting and arguing. Such unpleasantness is all it takes to spoiling the romantic mood. Find more great tips and guides on how to save your marriage at "Save My Marriage Today".




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