Feb 7, 2011

The Secret 5 Ways I Found To Save My Marriage

By Ana Marialla


Wedding vows are not to be taken lightly. Just because the new has worn off the relationship, divorce is not inevitable. Just like automobiles can be repaired, so can relationships be restored. Before you call it quits, try these simple 5 ways I found to save my marriage.

Believe you and your spouse belong together. When you exchanged vows, you entered into a covenant. It doesn't matter who performed the ceremony, or where it took place. It was a special celebration. Two people cared enough to join their lives together. When things go wrong, pray for guidance. Then follow the next four easy steps. Together, these are the secret 5 ways I found to save my marriage.

Keep a positive outlook. When negative thoughts come, don't allow them to linger. Reject them. Refuse to speak them. Thoughts determine attitudes. Attitude determines atmosphere. Fill your heart and home with a good atmosphere. Think and say good things. Fill the air with good words. Speak encouragement. Speak kindness. Speak love. Words can be destructive or constructive. Don't be negative about your spouse. Don't be negative about yourself. Think yourself happy.

Pay honest compliments. Don't say how much you like the jacket. Say "I like how you look in that jacket". Don't say "I love you" all the time. But let those words be in the air. Tell yourself how much you love him/her. But don't say it constantly to your spouse. Think it. Act like it. To repeatedly say it makes you look clingy and insecure. Confidence is attractive. Don't even think divorce. Think happy. Act happy. Be happy.

Communicate with each other. Okay, so the word communicate gets highly over used. It gets worn out. It gets thrown around so much that the meaning gets lost. But we can't get so tired of hearing it that we devalue its importance. Remember that communication has two sides to it. The ability to listen is an art. With our tight schedules, we must quiet our busy minds and listen. Spend time together without the kids. Make dates, and keep them. Absence does not make hearts grow fonder. It turns lovers into strangers. Eat together. Sleep together. Laugh together. Hold hands.

Stay faithful. Even if your spouse isn't. Treat your spouse the way you want to be treated. The two of you probably used to be best friends. You wanted to spend your lives together. That closeness can be renewed. Don't give up. Hang in there.

Maybe this sounds too passive. Or, maybe it sounds too easy. But it is really a lesson in behaviour modification. It requires practicing self control. It requires work. It is not always as easy as it sounds. But it can be done, and it does work.

Throw away the parachute. Ride out the storm. Don't bail out until you give it your best effort. You can make it through to victory. These are the 5 ways I found to save my marriage. May they do the same for you.




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