Feb 1, 2012

Making Up Immediately After Breaking Up Isn't Usually Easy, Nevertheless It Certainly Can Be Done

By V K Rajagopalan


In case you and the one you desire have just lately split, making up probably ranks extremely high on your agenda. The nice news is that most failed relationships can be mended, providing you adhere to a few very basic rules.

First of all, it's important to forget all about any negative advice you may have been given. Quite often, when couples split up, their wellwishers advise them to move on, and tell them it's best to find a different person.

Obviously your pals don't mean any harm, and are as a matter of fact only hoping to be supportive, but if the person you broke up with really meant the world to yourself, then why shouldn't you try to patch things up? Do you actually need to find a new partner? Making up may not be the most simple option, but it's certainly not the most difficult option either.

As I've already said, you should make use of few surefire rules. For example, don't even consider playing the blame game. Even if you happen to be convinced your ex partner was responsible for the break-up, let it go.

Now is the time for ironing out your differences and for identifying exactly what caused the split. Remember, there are a couple of sides to every coin. Sure, if you caught your partner being unfaithfull, then you definitely have every right to feel upset, and yes, you probably do have the right to point a finger, but that won't mend your relationship. If you can't forgive, then you honestly should walk away.

The next most important rule is for you to give your ex some space. Basically, don't start phoning them all the time, and don't send them sms messages repeatedly either. Permit them a while to reflect on what has happened.

Phoning them or texting them all the time will make you appear desperate, and besides, the continual harassment will likely push them even further away. Additionally you don't want to be bumping into them by chance every single day. They'll know you're doing it intentionally, and you'll most probably find they'll soon seek to avoid you whenever possible.

Appearing desperate is most certainly not the way to go. Instead, you have to adopt a mature approach. Give your ex a bit of time, then begin slowly. Even when the both of you do make arrangements to meet up, offer to meet your wife/husband in a public area. This will certainly make her or him feel more at ease and it'll also minimize the risk of any angry outbursts.

Remember, when you go to meet your partner, you're doing it because making up is significant to you personally. If you were mostly to blame for the breakup, allow them to understand that you're willing to change, but if you ex was mostly to blame, you must allow them to apologize when they're ready. In the mean time, just let them realize that you know the pair of you can work things out, and that there's nobody on this planet you'd rather be with.




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