Sep 24, 2011

How to Save a Marriage: Learn how Conversation Impacts Your Marriage

By Lisa McDonald


Are you searching for answers on how to save a marriage? If you do, then this article will be worth your time. To begin with, let us start checking on some details. Most professionals agree that separation and divorce usually come from the fact that married individuals lack communication. Here you'll see how communication affects relationships and how it can help you strengthen your marriage marital life.

Achieving right and open communication for married couples mean not only saying what your brain wants you to say but actually making yourself felt by the other person. This means opening up to your partner what you truly feel about him, his peculiar behavior or the conflicts that arise from time to time. However, this must be done in a constructive and calm manner. Humor works well for constructive criticisms, too. Recognizing your partner's deeper feelings nurture intimacy for both of you.

When does communication play a particular role for marriage? Guess what, it actually starts even before you walk down the aisle and have made your altar vows. If you want to know the principles on how to save a marriage, then don't miss out on the money issue. One vital topic prior to marriage is about finances. This is often the hardest to discuss among couples. Try to speak up about each others unsettled debts or financial responsibilities. Reconciling an impulsive spender's ways prior to getting married is utmost important. This will save you from waking up one morning and finding a surprise huge debt is threatening all your savings. Ignoring unsettled accounts will only haunt not just you or your partner but your children as well.

If you really desire to find out know how to save a marriage, taking time to talk to your partner about your marital issues by using the word "I" can help you keep your relationship. You can say "I am very concerned how your job is affecting your actions towards our kids." Other than that, you can say "Can we have some time to talk about this?" These kinds of statements work well as "You" statements tend to be very controlling. On the other hand, statements with the word "I" concentrates on self-revelation, thus calling your partner to listen attentively to what you need to say.

In addition, asking a favored time to discuss things shows that you're really sensitive to your spouse's needs. Agreeing to talk mutually also proves that you're both committed into solving problems together. This can also help you solve whatever problems that may arise in the future.

Empathizing with your partner is also a great communication technique. Listen well to your partner and provide empathetic answers related to the content of the message he wishes to relay to you. Be thoughtful with your responses and acknowledge your partner. Example of an empathetic statement is, "I understand how you feel about being ignored because you usually do all the house chores. I'd like to lighten up the load by helping you." This statement recognizes your partner's feelings and at the same time, making her feel important and that you want to share that burden with her. An affectionate touch, sincere look or even a sincere hug will greatly help you deliver empathy.

If you want to know how to save a marriage, it's very important that you think of solutions to your problems together. Use a shared decision making process so you can come up with the best resolutions that you both agree about. Doing this will help you build or strengthen your relationship along the process.

Other than that, don't underestimate the value of giving positive feedback. Let your partner know that you appreciate the breakfast he or she made. Show him or her that you recognize his or her efforts in making things work despite his or her hectic schedules.

Now that you know some essential principles on how to save a marriage, you should always remember that saving a relationship begins even before your special day. By this we mean that saving a relationship entails mental, emotional, physical, spiritual and even financial preparations. Becoming mature with these kinds of issues will really improve your likelihood of having a delightful marriage bond.




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